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Read Summary of '''[[Parenting Prenatal Education Summary|ParentingPrenatal Education]]'''

=What is Parenting The Relationship between Man and Woman?=

==Role To reduce the woman’s part to solely interior and domestic occupations, and the man’s part to exclusively exterior and social occupations, thus separating what should be united, would be to perpetuate the present sad state of Mother==things, from which both are equally suffering. It is in front of the highest duties and heaviest responsibilities that their respective qualities must unite in a close and confident solidarity.Is it not time that this hostile attitude of the two sexes facing one another as irreconcilable adversaries should cease? A severe, a painful lesson is being given to the nations. On the ruins piled up now, new constructions more beautiful and more harmonious can be erected. It is no longer the moment for frail competitions and self-interested claims; all human beings, men or women, must associate in a common effort to become conscious of the highest ideal which asks to be realised and to work ardently for its realisation. The question to be solved, the real question is then not only that of a better utilisation of their outer activities, but above all that of an inner spiritual growth. Without inner progress there is no possible outer progress.Thus the problem of feminism, as all the problems of the world, comes back to a spiritual problem. For the spiritual reality is at the basis of all others; the divine world, the Dhammata of Buddhism, is the eternal foundation on which are built all the other worlds. In regard to this Supreme Reality all are equal, men and women, in rights and in duties; the only distinction which can exist in this domain being based on the sincerity and ardour of aspiration, on the constancy of the will. And it is in the recognition of this fundamental spiritual equality that can be found the only serious and lasting solution for this problem of the relation of the sexes. It is in this light that it must be placed, it is at this height that must be sought the focus of action and new life, around which will be constructed the future temple of Humanity. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/02/woman-and-the-war#p9,p10,p11</ref>

I must tell you something about the source of <center>~</center> As soon as a mother's love for her child. It human being is because this child is made of her very own substance, and for quite sufficiently enlightened to have a long timecontact, relatively longhowever slight, with the all-pervading mystery of the material linkuniverse, he becomes necessarily humble.Woman, by the link very fact of substanceher passivity, between mother and child is extremely close—it is as though a bit having more easily than man the intuition of her flesh had been taken out and put apart the Supreme Power at a distance—and it work in the world, is only much later that more often, more naturally humble.But to base the tie between the two fact of this humility on need is completely cuterroneous. There is a kind of tieWoman needs man not more than man needs woman; or rather, more exactly, man and woman have an equal need of subtle sensation, such that one another. Even in the mother feels exactly what the child feelsmere material domain, there are as many men who depend materially upon women as she would feel it in herselfthere are women who depend upon men. That If humility were a result of that dependency, then is , in the first case, the material basis of men ought to be humble and the mother's attachment for women to have the childauthority. It is a basis of material identityBesides, nothing else but to say that. Feeling comes much later (women should be humble because it may come earlieris thus that they please men, is also erroneous. It would lead one to think that depends woman has been put on people), but I am speaking earth only for the purpose of giving pleasure to man—which is absurd. All the universe has been created to express the majority: feeling comes only long afterwardsDivine Power, and it is conditioned. There are all kinds human beings, men or women, have for special mission to become conscious of thingsand to manifest that Eternal Divine Essence.Such is their object and none other.. I could speak And if they knew and remembered that more often, men and women would cease to you for hours on the subject. But still this must think of petty quarrels about priority or authority; they would not be mixed up with love. It is see a material identification which makes greater mark of respect in the mother feel intimatelyfact of being served than of serving, feel quite concretely and tangibly what the child is feeling: if for all would consider themselves equally as servitors of the child receives a shockDivine, well, the mother feels and would make it. This lasts at least for two monthstheir honour to serve ever more and ever better. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/0602/14woman-apriland-1954man#p23p1,p2,p3,p4,p5,p6</ref>

First Sweet Mother, What is the eternal truth behind this sympathy or attraction of allman for woman and of woman for man? The relationship between Purusha and Prakriti. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/16/5-january-1965#p2,p3</ref> ==What is Love?== Love is not sexual intercourse.Love is not vital attraction and interchange.Love is not the heart’s hunger for affection.Love is a mighty vibration coming straight from the One, and only the effect very pure and very strong are capable of physical environment was recognised receiving and studied long agomanifesting it. It To be pure is by surrounding to be open only to the Supreme’s influence and to no other. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/14/love-and-sexual-desire#p1,p2,p3,p4,p5</ref> <center>~</center> What should be the ideal of a modern woman in ordinary life? In ordinary life, women with forms can have all the ideas they like, it is not very important. From the spiritual point of art view, men and women are equal in their capacity to realise the Divine. Each one must do so in his (or her) own way and beauty thataccording to his (or her) own possibilities. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/10/aphorism-303-304-305#p4,p5,p6</ref> =Role of Women= And from now, we must reassume our veritable position, take again our due place and assert our real importance—that of spiritual former and educator. Indeed, some men, perhaps a little by littlevainglorious of their so-called advantages, may despise the apparent weakness of women (although even this exterior weakness is not quite certain) but: ‘Do what he may, the superman will have to be born of woman all the same,’ someone said very rightly. The superman shall be born of woman, this is a big unquestionable truth; but it is not enough to be proud of this truth, we must clearly understand what it means, become aware of the responsibility it creates, and learn to face earnestly the ancient Greeks created task which is put before us. This task is precisely our most important share in the exceptionally harmonious race present world-wide work. For that they were, we must first understand—at least in their broad lines—what are the means by which the present chaos and obscurity can be transformed into light and harmony.

Individual instances Many means have been suggested: political, social, ethical, even religious. ... Indeed, none of these seem sufficient to face with any reliable success the magnitude of the same fact are numeroustask to be done. It is not rare to see Only a woman whonew spiritual influx, while pregnant, had looked at constantly and admired creating in man a beautiful picture or statuenew consciousness, giving birth to a child after can overcome the perfect likeness of this picture or statue. I met several enormous mass of these instances myself. Among them, I remember very clearly two little girls; they were twins and perfectly beautiful. But difficulties barring the most astonishing was how little like their parents they were. They reminded me way of a very famous picture painted by the English artist Reynoldsworkers. One day I made this remark to the motherA new spiritual light, who immediately exclaimed: "Indeed, is it not so? You will be interested to know that while I was expecting these children, I had, hanging above my beda manifestation upon earth of some divine force unknown until now, a very good reproduction Thought of Reynolds' picture. Before going to sleep and as soon as I wokeGod, my last and first glance was new for that picture; and in my heart I hoped: may my children be like the faces in us, descending into this picture. You see that I succeeded quite well!" In truth, she could be proud of her success, world and her example is of great utility for other womentaking a new form here.

But if And here we can obtain such results on the physical plane where the materials are the least plasticcome back to our starting point, how much more so on the psychological plane where the influence of thought and will is so powerful. Why accept the obscure bonds of heredity and atavism—which are nothing else than subconscious preferences for to our own trend duty of character—when we can, by concentration and will, call into being a type constructed according to the highest ideal we are able to conceive? With this effort, true maternity becomes truly precious and sacred; indeed with . For this, we enter form meant to manifest the glorious work spiritual force capable of transforming the Spiritearth’s present conditions, and womanhood rises above animality and its ordinary instinctsthis new form, towards real humanity and its powers. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/02/who is to-construct it if not the-women-of-japan#p4,p5,p6</ref>?

So if your parents or your teacher sometimes urge you Let us try first to control your nature, it discover where this impulse of Nature will lead us. And the best way for that is not because they think that your faults, whether great or small, are incorrigible; but, to look back on the contrary, it is because they know that your quick and fiery spirit is like a young thoroughbred which must be held in check.<ref>http://incarnatewordlessons given to us by the Past.in/cwm/02/self-control#p15</ref>

==Transfer We see that each progress of Deep-rooted Imprints from Parents to Children==Nature, each manifestation of a new capacity and principle upon earth is marked by the appearance of a new species. In the same way, the progressive forms of the life of races, of peoples, of individuals, follow each other through the human cycles, ceaselessly inspired, fecundated, renewed by the efforts of the guides of humanity. And all these forms aim at the same goal, the mysterious, the glorious goal of Nature.

“The business of both parent and teacher It is to enable and to help the child this call of Nature that we must answer, to educate himselfthis magnificent, to develop his own intellectual, moral, aesthetic and practical capacities and this grandiose work that we must devote ourselves. Let us try to grow freely make as an organic being, not to be kneaded clear as we can the steps of our advance on this difficult and pressured into form like an inert plastic material.” <ref>http://incarnatewordas yet unexplored path.in/cwm/12/teachers#p13</ref>

===The Children First of Japan===all we must be careful, in our attempt to conceive the future man or superman, not to adopt an actual type of man, perfecting or aggrandising him. To avoid as much as possible this mistake we should study the teachings of life’s evolution. We have already seen that the appearance of a new species always announces the manifestation on earth of a new principle, a new plane of consciousness, a new force or power. But, at the same time, while the new species acquires this formerly unmanifested power or consciousness, it may lose one or many of the perfections which were the characteristics of the immediately preceding species. For instance, to speak only of the last step of Nature’s development, what are the greatest differences between man and his immediate predecessor, the ape? In the monkey we see vitality and physical ability reaching the utmost perfection, a perfection that the new species had to abandon. For man, there has been no more of that marvellous climbing up trees, somersaults over abysses, jumps from summit to summit, but in exchange he acquired intelligence, the power of reasoning, combining, constructing. Indeed with man it is the life of mind, of intellect which appeared on earth. Man is essentially a mental being; and if his possibilities do not stop there, if he feels in himself other worlds, other faculties, other planes of consciousness beyond his mental life, they are only as promises for the future, in the same way as the mental possibilities are latent in the monkey.

We could quite well call Japan the paradise of children—in no other country It is true that some men, very few, have I seen them so free and so happy. After months of residence lived in Japan I have yet never seen a child beaten by a grown-up person. They are treated as if all the parents were conscious that world beyond, which we may call the children are the promise and spiritual; some have been, indeed, the glory living incarnations of the future. And a wonderful thing is thatworld on earth, environed by so much attention, so much care,—indeed, such a devotion, but they are the most reasonableexceptions, good and serious children I have ever met. When they are babiesthe forerunners showing the way to the race, tied up in an amusing fashion on their mothers' backsleading it towards its future realisation, with their wide open black eyes they seem to consider life with gravity and to have already opinions on not the things they look ataverage man. You scarcely hear a child cry. When, for instance, he has hurt himself and But that which was the tears burst out privilege of his eyes, the mother or the father has but to say a few words in a low voicebeings scattered through time and space, and shall become the central characteristic of the sorrow seems to be swept away. What are those magic words new type which enable children to be so reasonable? Very simple indeed: "Are you not a Samurai?" And this question is sufficient for the child to call to him all his energy and to overcome his weaknessappear.

A country where such At present, man governs his life through reason; all the activities of the mind are the children of common use for him; his means of knowledge are observation and so they are treated deduction; it is a country still ascending the steps of progress by and through reasoning that he takes his decision and of mastery.<ref>https://incarnatewordchooses his way—or believes he does—in life.in/cwm/02/the-children-of-japan#p2,p6</ref>

=How The new race shall be governed by intuition, that is to Practice Good Parenting?=say, direct perception of the divine law within. Some human beings actually know and experience intuition—as, undoubtedly, certain big gorillas of the forests have glimpses of reasoning.

…in order This faculty which is exceptional, almost abnormal now, will certainly be quite common and natural for the new race, the man of tomorrow. But probably the constant exercise of it will be detrimental to the reasoning faculties. As man possesses no more the extreme physical ability of the monkey, so also will the superman lose the extreme mental ability of man, this ability to deceive himself and others. Thus, man’s road to supermanhood will be able open when he declares boldly that all he has yet developed, including the intellect of which he is so rightly and yet so vainly proud, is now no longer sufficient for him, and that to educate uncase, discover, set free this greater power within, shall be henceforward his great preoccupation. Then will his philosophy, art, science, ethics, social existence, vital pursuits be no longer an exercise of mind and life for themselves, in a childcircle, but a means for the discovery of a greater Truth behind mind and life and the bringing of its power into our human existence. And this discovery is that of our real, because our highest self and nature. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/02/to educate oneself-the-women-of-japan#p11,p12,p13, p14,p15,p16,p17,p18,p19,p20,p21,p22,p23,p24,p25,p26,p27,p28</ref> =What is True Maternity?= Maternity is considered as the principal role of woman. But this is true only so long as we understand what is meant by the word maternity. For to become bring children into the world as rabbits do their young—instinctively, ignorantly, machine-like, that certainly cannot be called maternity! True maternity begins with the conscious and master creation of a being, with the willed shaping of oneself so that one never sets a bad example soul coming to one's childdevelop and utilise a new body. The true domain of women is the spiritual. For We forget it is above all through example that education becomes effectivebut too often.  To speak good words and to give wise advice to bear a child has very little effect if one does and construct his body almost subconsciously is not oneself give him enough. The work really commences when, by the power of thought and will, we conceive and create a character capable of manifesting an example ideal… And do not say that we have no power for realising such a thing. Innumerable instances of what one teachesthis very effective power could be brought out as proofs.<ref>https://incarnateword. Sincerityin/cwm/02/to-the-women-of-japan#p1, honestyp2, straightforwardnessp3</ref>The education of a human being should begin at birth and continue throughout his life.Indeed, courageif we want this education to have its maximum result, disinterestednessit should begin even before birth; in this case it is the mother herself who proceeds with this education by means of a twofold action: first, unselfishnessupon herself for her own improvement, patienceand secondly, enduranceupon the child whom she is forming physically. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/12/education#p1, perseverancep2</ref>=How to Prepare for an Ideal Child?= ''Yes, peaceit's the parents who should be educated!'' ...Of course, calmwe know from experience you can give the form that you imagine; in the broad lines, self-you can give the character you imagine; all that is quite correct. So to begin with, it’s the mother who should be educated, not the child. Then, through a very strict control are of your own reactions, you can prevent certain wrong impulses from mixing into the child’s making. But all things that are taught infinitely better by example than by beautiful speechesisn’t new, it’s been known for a long time since it’s what I practiced when I was expecting a child. So I know it. ParentsBut once again, have it’s the mother who must be educated, before she has a high ideal and always act child, that’s what matters…<ref>https://incarnateword.in accordance /agenda/08/april-19-1967#p11,p15</ref>For it goes without saying that there is a stupendous difference between conceiving a child deliberately, with a conscious aspiration, a call to the invisible world and a spiritual ardour, and conceiving a child by accident and without intending to have it , and you will see sometimes even without wanting it at all. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/08/24-october-1956#p17</ref> ==By Creating a Harmonious Environment== For it is certain that little by little your the nature of the child to be born depends very much upon the mother who forms it, upon her aspiration and will reflect this ideal as well as upon the material surroundings in himself which she lives. To see that her thoughts are always beautiful and pure, her feelings always noble and fine, her material surroundings as harmonious as possible and spontaneously manifest full of a great simplicity—this is the qualities you would like part of education which should apply to see expressed the mother herself. And if she has in his nature. Quite naturally addition a child has respect conscious and admiration for his parents; unless they are quite unworthy, they definite will always appear to their form the child as demigods whom he will try according to imitate as the highest ideal she can conceive, then the very best he conditions will be realised so that the child cancome into the world with his utmost potentialities.<ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/12/education#p5p2</ref>

…parents or those who look after youAt any rate, took the trouble to teach you how to do what you dofather and mother should first know the possibility (at least the possibility) of a child being more than a mere animal man.Then, do it properly as it conception should take place entirely outside of desire. That's another very difficult condition to be donefulfilled.And the mother, in throughout the right waygestation, then that would help you to avoid all—all these mistakes you make through the years…To live should be in the right way an atmosphere absolutely protected from all degrading influences: an ideally beautiful place, a wonderful climate where everything is harmonious, and a very difficult artwholly spontaneous, free and unless one begins to learn it when quite young harmonious and to make an effort, one never knows it very wellbeautiful life sheltered from all vulgarities of life. Simply And the art mother herself should have the ideal of keeping one's body in good healththe new child. It should be done not as a mechanical but as a conscious, one's mind quiet and goodwill willed thing in one's heart—things which are indispensable in order to live decently—I don't say in comfortan absolutely "creative" atmosphere, I don't say remarkably, I only we might say decently. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwmagenda/0608/2april-june19-19541967#p5p21,p22,p7p23</ref>

When …the mother, throughout the body feels its miseriesgestation, its limitationsshould be in an atmosphere absolutely protected from all degrading influences: an ideally beautiful place, one must establish this dream in it—of a strength which would have no limitwonderful climate where everything is harmonious, and a beauty which would have no uglinesswholly spontaneous, free and harmonious and beautiful life sheltered from all vulgarities of marvellous capacities: one dreams life. And the mother herself should have the ideal of being able to rise into the air, of being wherever it is necessary to new child. It should bedone not as a mechanical but as a conscious, of setting things right when they go wrong, of healing the sick; indeedwilled thing in an absolutely “creative” atmosphere, one has all sorts of dreams when one is very young…we might say. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwmagenda/0908/31april-july19-19571967#p6p23</ref>

Another thing should be taught In many countries of old―and even now in certain countries―the woman who was going to have a child from his early years: to enjoy cleanliness was placed in special conditions of beauty, harmony, peace and observe hygienic habits. Butwell-being, in obtaining this cleanliness and respect for the rules of hygiene from very harmonious physical conditions, so that the child, one must take great care not to instil into him could be formed in the fear of illnessbest possible conditions. Fear This is the worst instrument of education and the surest way of attracting obviously what is feared. Yet, while there should ought to be no fear of illnessdone, there should be no inclination for it eitheris within the reach of human possibilities. There is a prevalent belief that brilliant minds Human beings are found in weak bodiesdeveloped enough for this not to be something quite exceptional. This And yet it is a delusion and has no basis. There was perhaps a time when a romantic and morbid taste quite exceptional, for physical unbalance prevailed; butvery few people think of it, fortunately, that tendency has disappearedwhile there are ''innumerable'' people who have children without even wanting to. Nowadays a well-built, robust, muscular, strong and well-balanced body is appreciated at its true value. In any case, children should be taught to respect health and admire the healthy man whose vigorous body knows how to repel attacks of illness. Often a child feigns illness It is possible to avoid some troublesome obligation, call a work that does not interest himsoul, or simply to soften his parents' hearts and get them to satisfy some caprice. The child but one must be taught as early as possible that this does not work and that he does not become more interesting by being illat least a little conscious oneself, but rather the contrary. The weak have a tendency to believe that their weakness makes them particularly interesting and must want to use this weakness and if necessary even illness as a means of attracting the attention and sympathy of do what one does in the people around thembest conditions. On no account should this pernicious tendency be encouraged. Children should therefore be taught that to be ill This is a sign of weakness and inferiorityvery rare, not of some virtue or sacrificebut it is possible.children should be taught to respect health and admire the healthy man whose vigorous body knows how to repel attacks of illness… <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/1208/physical27-june-education1956#p9p11,p12,p13</ref>

But in any case a child, whatever his activities, should have a sufficient number First of hours of sleep. The number will vary according to his age. In the cradleall, the baby should sleep longer than he remains awake. The number effect of hours of sleep will diminish as the child growsphysical environment was recognized and studied long ago. But until maturity it should not be less than eight hours, in a quiet, well-ventilated place. The child should never be made to stay up late for no reason. The hours before midnight are the best for resting the nerves. Even during the waking hours, relaxation It is indispensable for all who want to maintain their nervous balance. To know how to relax the muscles by surrounding women with forms of art and the nerves is an art which should be taught to children when they are very young. There are many parents who, on the contrarybeauty that, push their child to constant activity. When the child remains quietlittle by little, they imagine that he is ill. There are even parents who have the bad habit of making their child do household work at ancient Greeks created the expense of his rest and relaxation. Nothing is worse for a developing nervous system, which cannot stand the strain of too continuous an effort or of an activity exceptionally harmonious race that is imposed upon it and not freely chosenthey were. <ref>http://incarnateword.in/cwm/12/physical-education#p11</ref> ===Forbearance===

If from her childhood Individual instances of the same fact are numerous. It is not rare to see a girl has been accustomed to pay much attention to the slightest uneasiness woman who, while pregnant, had looked at constantly and admired a beautiful picture or statue, giving birth to make a big fuss about child after the smallest inconvenienceperfect likeness of this picture or statue. I met several of these instances myself. Among them, then she loses all capacity of endurance I remember very clearly two little girls; they were twins and anything becomes the occasion for being pulled downperfectly beautiful. Especially if But the most astonishing was how little like their parents themselves get too easily anxious about they were. They reminded me of a very famous picture painted by the reactions of their childrenEnglish artist Reynolds. It One day I made this remark to the mother, who immediately exclaimed: ‘Indeed, is wiser it not so? You will be interested to teach know that while I was expecting these children, I had, hanging above my bed, a child very good reproduction of Reynolds’ picture. Before going to be a bit sturdy sleep and as soon as I woke, my last and enduring than to show much care first glance was for these small inconveniences that picture; and accidents that cannot always in my heart I hoped: may my children be avoided like the faces in lifethis picture. An attitude You see that I succeeded quite well!’ In truth, she could be proud of quiet forbearance her success, and her example is the best one can adopt of great utility for oneself and teach to the children. <ref>http://incarnatewordother women.in/cwm/12/to-women-about-their-body#p33</ref>

...why do I insist on the fact that children should be told from a very early age that it is absolutely necessary to be sincere?Children are very often taught how to outsmart othersIn this effort, how to dissimulate so as to appear good in others' eyes. Some parents try to control children through fearthis attempt, and that is the worst possible method of educationthen, for it is an incentive to lying, deceit, hypocrisy and all the restlies our true duty. But And if you repeatedly explain to children something of this kind: If you are not absolutely sincere, not only with others but also with yourself, if at any time you try to cover up your imperfections and failings, you will never make any progress, you will duty was always remain what you are throughout all your life, without ever making any progress. So, even if you only want to grow out of this primitive unconscious state into a progressive consciousness, the most important thing, the one absolutely important thing is sincerity. If you have done something which you ought not to have donegreatest importance, you must admit it to yourself; if certainly has taken a less-than-admirable movement has occurred in yourself, you must look it capital one in the face and tell yourself, "It was not good," or "It was disgusting," or even "It was wickedpresent turn of the earth’s evolution." <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/1502/6to-the-women-januaryof-1951japan#p24p4,p5,p6,p7</ref>

==Bad ParentingBy Aspiration ==

To ask? For that they must have an occult knowledge which they don’t usually have. But if you take a boy anyway, what is possible is that instead of doing the thing like an animal driven by instinct or desire and most of fourteenthe time, for examplewithout even wanting it, who is they do it at schoolwill, who has ordinary parents and has been ill-treatedwith an aspiration, his mind is very much putting themselves in the forefront; there is something hard in hima state of aspiration and almost of prayer, so that the psychic being has gone behindthey are going to form may be one fit to embody a soul which they can ''call'' down to incarnate in that form. Such boys do I knew people―not many, this does not respond often happen, but still I knew some―who chose special circumstances, prepared themselves through special concentration and meditation and aspiration and sought to bring down, into the vibration. One would say body they are made of wood or plasterwere going to form, an exceptional being. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/0408/827-januaryjune-19511956#p23p9,p25p10</ref>

''Some children are wicked…woman who has a psychic aspiration herself and, for some reason or other, without knowing why or how, would like to have an exceptional child, answering certain exceptional conditions; if at this moment there is this aspiration upon earth, it creates a vibration, a psychic light which the psychic being sees immediately and, without hesitation it rushes towards it. Then, from that moment (which is the moment of conception), it watches over the formation of the child, so that this formation may be as favourable as possible to the plan it has; consequently its influence is there over the child even before it appears in the physical world. Is If all goes well, if there is no accident (accidents can always happen), if all goes well at the moment the child is about to be born, the psychic force (perhaps not in its totality, but a part of the psychic consciousness) rushes into the being and from its very first cry gives it because their a push towards the experiences it wants the child to acquire. The result is that even if the parents did are not conscious, even if the child in its external consciousness is not quite conscious (a little child does not aspire have the necessary brain for that, it forms slowly, little by little), in spite of that, it will be possible for the psychic influence to direct all the events, all the circumstances of the life of this child till the moment it becomes capable of coming into conscious contact with its psychic being (physically it is generally between the age of four and seven, sometimes sooner, sometimes almost immediately, but in such a case we deal with children who are not ‘children’, who have ‘supernatural’ qualities, as they say—they are not ‘supernatural’, but simply the expression of the presence of the psychic being). But there are people who have not had the chance or rather the good fortune if one may call it that, of meeting someone, physically, who could instruct them?''. And yet they have the feeling that every step of their existence, every circumstance of their life is arranged by someone conscious, so that they may make the maximum progress.<ref> https://incarnateword.in/cwm/04/24-february-1951#p22,p23</ref>

It is perhaps a subconscious wickedness in the parents. It is said that people throw out their wickedness from themselves by giving it birth in their children. One has always a shadow in oneself. There are people who project this outside—that does not always free them from it, but still perhaps it comforts them! But it is the child who "profits" by it, you see? It is quite evident that the state ===The Parent’s State of consciousness in which the parents are at that moment is of capital importance. If they have very low and vulgar ideas, the children will reflect them quite certainly. And all these children who are ill-formed, ill-bred, incomplete (specially from the point of view of intelligence: with holes, things missing), children who are only half-conscious and half-formed—this is always due to the state of consciousness in which the parents were when they conceived the child. Even as the state of consciousness of the last moments of life is of capital importance for the future of the one who is departing, so too the state of consciousness in which the parents are at the moment of conception gives a sort of stamp to the child, which it will reflect throughout its life. So, these are apparently such little things—the mood of the moment, the moment's aspiration or degradation, anything whatsoever, everything that takes place at a particular moment—it seems to be so small a thing, and it has so great a consequence: it brings into the world a child who is incomplete or wicked or finally a failure. And people are not aware of that.Consciousness during Conception===

Some children are wicked. Is it because their parents did not aspire for them?It is perhaps a subconscious wickedness in the parents. It is said that people throw out their wickedness from themselves by giving it birth in their children. One has always a shadow in oneself. There are people who project this outside—that does not always free them from it, but still perhaps it comforts them! But it is the child who “profits” by it, you see? It is quite evident that the state of consciousness in which the parents are at that moment is of capital importance. If they have very low and vulgar ideas, the children will reflect them quite certainly. And all these children who are ill-formed, ill-bred, incomplete (specially from the point of view of intelligence: with holes, things missing), children who are only half-conscious and half-formed—this is always due to the state of consciousness in which the parents were when they conceived the child. Even as the state of consciousness of the last moments of life is of capital importance for the future of the one who is departing, so too the state of consciousness in which the parents are at the moment of conception gives a sort of stamp to the child, which it will reflect throughout its life. So, these are apparently such little things—the mood of the moment, the moment’s aspiration or degradation, anything whatsoever, everything that takes place at a particular moment—it seems to be so small a thing, and it has so great a consequence: it brings into the world a child who is incomplete or wicked or finally a failure. And people are not aware of that.Later, when the child behaves nastily, they scold it. But they should begin by scolding themselves, telling themselves: "In “In what a horrible state of consciousness I must have been when I brought that child into the world." ” For it is truly that.<ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/05/30-december-1953#p11,p12,p13</ref>

In modern "civilised" life, parents and teachers, by their practical and rational "good advice", lose no time in covering up this spontaneity which they call unconsciousness, and substituting for it a very small, very narrow, limited mental ego, withdrawn into itself, crammed with notions of misbehaviour and sin and punishment or of personal interest, calculation and profit; all of which has ''Is the inevitable result of increasing vital desires through repression, fear or self-justification.distorted from the very birth?''

And yet If your birth has not been accidental, you could very well think there was no distortion, but what you are at your birth is most of the time almost absolutely what your mother and father have made you, and also, through them, what your grandparents have made you. There are certain vital traditions in families and, besides, there is the state of consciousness in which you were formed, conceived—the moment at which you were conceived—and that, not once in a million times does that state conform to true aspiration; and it is only a true aspiration which could make your vital pure of all mixture, make the vital element attracted for the sake formation of completeness the being a pure element, free from all contagion; I mean that if a psychic being enters there, it can gather elements favourable to its growth. In the world as it should be added is, things are so mixed up, have been so mixed up in every way, that because man it is a mental beingalmost impossible to have elements of the vital sufficiently pure not to suffer the contagion of all other contaminated beings.I think I have already spoken about that, he must necessarily I have said what kind of aspiration ought to be there in the course parents before the birth; but as I said, this does not happen even once in a hundred thousand instances. The willed conception of his evolution leave behind a child is extremely rare; mostly it is an accident. Among innumerable parents it is quite a small minority that even simply bothers about what a child could be; they do not even know that what the child will be depends on what they are. It is a very small élite which knows this unconscious . Most of the time things go as they can; anything at all happens and spontaneous puritypeople don’t even realise what is happening. So, in these conditions how do you expect to be born with a vital being sufficiently pure to be of help to you? One is born with a slough to clean before one begins to live. And once you have made a good start on the way to the inner transformation and you go down to the subconscient root of the being—that exactly which comes from parents, from atavism—well, you do see what it is ! And all, almost all difficulties are there, there are very similar few things added to existence after the purity first years of life. This happens at any odd moment; if you keep bad company or read bad books, the animalpoison may enter you; but there are all the imprints deep-rooted in the subconscient, the dirty habits you have and against which you struggle. For instance, there are people who can’t open their mouth without telling a lie, and after passing through an unavoidable period they don’t always do this deliberately (that is the worst of it), or people who can’t come in touch with others without quarrelling, all sorts of mental perversion stupidities—they are there in the subconscient, deeply rooted. Now, when you have a goodwill, externally you do your best to avoid all that, to correct it if possible; you work, you fight; then become aware that this thing always keeps coming up, it comes up from some part which escapes your control. But if you enter this subconscient, if you let your consciousness infiltrate it, and impuritylook carefully, rise beyond gradually you will discover all the mind into sources, all the higher origins of all your difficulties; then you will begin to understand what your fathers and mothers, grandfathers and luminous purity grandmothers were, and if at a certain moment you are unable to control yourself, you will understand, “I am like that because they were like that.If you have within you a psychic being sufficiently awake to watch over you, to prepare your path, it can draw towards you things which help you, draw people, books, circumstances, all sorts of little coincidences which come to you as though brought by some benevolent will and give you an indication, a help, a support to take decisions and turn you in the divine consciousnessright direction.[Based But once you have taken this decision, once you have decided to find the truth of your being, once you start sincerely on Aphorism 30 I saw the road, then everything seems to conspire to help you to advance, and if you observe carefully you see gradually the source of your difficulties: “Ah! Wait a child wallowing minute, this defect was in my father; oh! this habit was my mother’s; oh! my grandmother was like this, my grandfather was like that.” Or it could well be the dirt nurse who took care of you when you were small, or brothers and sisters who played with you, the same child cleaned by his mother little friends you met, and resplendentyou will find that all this was there, but each in this person or that or the other. But if you continue to be sincere, you find you can cross all this quite calmly, and after a time you cut all the moorings with which you were born, break the chains and go freely on the path.If you really want to transform your character, it is that you must do. It has always been said that it is impossible to change one’s nature; in all books of philosophy, even of yoga, you are told the same story: “You cannot change your character, you are born like that, you are like that.” This is absolutely false, I trembled before his utter purityguarantee it is false; but there is something very difficult to do to change your character, because it is not your character which must be changed, it is the character of your antecedents. In them you will not change it (because they have no such intention), but it is in you that it must be changed. It is what they have given you, all the little gifts made to you at your birth—nice gifts—it is this which must be changed. But if you succeed in getting hold of the thread of these things, the true thread, since you have worked upon this with perseverance and sincerity, one fine morning you will be free; all this will fall off from you and you will be able to get a start in life without any burden. Then you will be a new man, living a new life, almost with a new nature.] And if you look back you will say, “It is not possible, I was never like that!” <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/1004/aphorism29-30march-1951#p5p14,p15,p16,p17,p18</ref>

Parents nearly always tell their children...the body is formed in a very unsatisfactory way for almost everyone―exceptions are so rare that one can hardly speak of them.I told you that due to this obscure birth one arrives with a whole physical baggage of things which generally have to be got rid of, if one truly wants to progress, "You must not lieand someone has quoted my own sentence which runs like this:“You are brought here by force, it the environment is very bad imposed on you by force, the laws of atavism of the milieu by force…”And now the person who wrote to tell me has asked me who does all that.Of course I could have been more explicit, but I thought I had been clear enough.The body is formed by a lie." But man and a woman who become the unfortunate thing father and mother, and it is that they lie who don’t even have the ''means'' of asking the being they are going to bring into the world whether it would like to come or whether this is in your presence and then you wonder why accordance with its destiny. And it is on this body they have formed that they want you impose by force, by force of necessity, an atavism, an environment, later an education, which will almost always be obstacles to do something its future growth.Therefore, I said here and I am repeating―it I thought I had been clear enough―that it was about the physical parents and the physical body I was speaking, nothing else. And that the soul which they don't do themselvesincarnates, whether it be in course of development or fully developed, has to struggle against the circumstances imposed on it by this animal birth, struggle in order to find its true path and again discover its own self fully. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/1508/627-januaryjune-19511956#p23p2,p3,p4,p5,p6,p7</ref> <center>~</center>

=Parenting But anyway―anyway―even in the best cases, even when the soul has come consciously, even when it has consciously participated in the formation of the physical body, still so long as the body is formed in the usual animal way, it will have to struggle and Rebirth=correct all those things which come from this human animality.Inevitably, parents have a particular formation, they are particularly healthy or unhealthy; even taking things at their best, they have a heap of atavisms, habits, formations in the subconscious and even in the unconscious, which come from their own birth, the environment they have lived in, their own life; and even if they are remarkable people, they have a large number of things which are quite opposed to the true psychic life―even the best of them, even the most conscious. And besides, there is all that is going to happen. Even if one takes a great deal of trouble over the education of one’s children, they will come in contact with all sorts of people who will have an influence over them, especially when they are very young, and these influences enter the subconscious, one has to struggle against them later on. I say: even in the best cases, because of the way in which the body is formed at present, you have to face innumerable difficulties which come more or less from the subconscious, but rise to the surface and against which you have to struggle before you can become completely free and develop normally. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/08/27-june-1956#p23,p24</ref>

==Understanding RebirthBy Having a Strong Body==

I am going ===Atmosphere during Delivery=== The most important thing is to give you quite be quiet, in a concrete example. Let us take a psychic being peaceful atmosphere so that has decided, for some reason or other, to enter the body of a being destined to become king, because there is a whole series of experiences it Force can have only under those conditionswork without disturbance. After having passed through these experiences of a king, it finds that there is a whole domain in which it cannot make a progress due to these very conditions of life where it is<ref>https://incarnateword. So when it has finished its term upon earth and decides to go away, it decides that in its next life it will take birth in an ordinary environment /cwm/13/community-affairs#p125</ref> =Birth and in ordinary conditions, neither high nor low, but such that the body which Psychic Being= In rebirth it will take up will be free to do what it likes. For I do is not tell you anything new when I say that the life of a king is the life of a slave; a king is obliged to submit to a whole protocol and to all kinds of ceremonies to keep his prestige (it is perhaps very pleasant for vain peopleexternal being, but for a psychic being it that which is not pleasantformed by parents, for this deprives it of the possibility of a large number of experiences). So having taken this decisionenvironment and circumstances—the mental, it carries in itself all the memories which a royal life can give it vital and it takes rest for the period it considers necessary. (Here, I must say that I am speaking of a psychic being exclusively occupied with itself, not one consecrated to a work, because in that case physical—that is born again: it is only the work which decides the future lives and their conditions; I am speaking of a psychic being at work completing its development.) Hence it decides that at a certain moment it will take a passes from body. Having already had a number of experiences, it knows that in a certain country, a certain part of the consciousness has developed; in another, another part, and so on; so it chooses the place which offers it easy possibilities of development: the country, the conditions of living, the approximate nature of the parents, and also the condition of the to body itself, its physical structure and the qualities it needs for its experiences. It takes restLogically, then at the required moment, wakes up and projects its consciousness upon earth centralising it in neither the chosen domain and mental nor the chosen conditions—or almost so; there is a small margin you know, for vital being can remember past lives or recognise itself in the psychic consciousness one is too far away from the material physical consciousness to be able to see with a clear vision; it is an approximation. It does not make a mistake about the country character or the environment and it sees quite clearly the inner vibrations mode of life of the people chosen, but there may happen to be a slight indecision. But if, just at this moment, there is a couple upon earth or rather a woman who has a that person. The psychic aspiration herself being alone can remember; and, for some reason or other, without knowing why or how, would like to have an exceptional child, answering certain exceptional conditions; if at this moment there it is this aspiration upon earth, it creates a vibration, a psychic light which the by becoming conscious of our psychic being sees immediately and, without hesitation it rushes towards it. Then, from that moment (which is we can have at the moment of conception)same time exact impressions about our past lives.Besides, it watches over the formation of the child, so that this formation may be as favourable as possible is much more important for us to fix our attention upon what we want to the plan it has; consequently its influence is there over the child even before it appears in the physical worldbecome than upon what we have been.<ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/0415/24-february-1951rebirth#p22p5,p6</ref>

''When the psychic is about to enter into the world, does it choose in advance the form it is going to take?'' It is an interesting question. That depends. As I have just told you, there are psychic beings who are in the making, progressing; these generally, right at the outset, cannot choose much, but when they have arrived at a certain degree of growth and of consciousness (generally while they are still in a physical body and have had a certain amount of experience), they decide at that time what their next field of experience will be like. I can give you some rather external examples. For instance, a psychic being needed to rebirthhave the experience of mastery, of power in order to know the reactions and how it must be confessed is possible to turn all these movements towards the Divine: to learn what a life of power may teach you. It took birth in a king or a queen. These enjoyed some power and during that no rule holds good time they had their experiences; they reached the end of the field of experience. Now, they know what they wanted to know, they are about to go, they are going to leave their body that’s now become useless, and they are going to prepare for all casesthe next experience. Some people are reborn almost immediately—it most often happens with parents Well, at that time, when the psychic being is still in the body and has noted what it has learnt, it decides for the next occasion. And sometimes it is a part movement of them gets assimilated into their children if action and reaction: because it has studied one entire field, it needs to study the latter are opposite field. And very often it chooses a very much attached to themdifferent life from the one it had. Some peopleSo before leaving, howeverit says: “Next time, it is in this domain that I shall take centuries birth….” Suppose, for example, the psychic has reached a stage of growth when it would like to have the chance of working on the physical body to make it capable of coming consciously into contact with the Divine and even thousands of years transforming it. Now, it is about to leave the body in which it had authority, power, activity, the body it has used for its growth; it says: “Next time I shall take birth in a neutral environment, neither low nor high, where it will not be reincarnatednecessary (how to put it?) to have a highly external life, where one will have neither great power nor great misery—altogether neutral, as you know, the life in between. They wait ” It chooses that. It returns to its own psychic world for the necessary conditions rest, for assimilation of the experience gained, for preparation of the future experience. It naturally remembers its choice and, before coming down once more, when it has finished its assimilation, when it is time to return, to come down upon earth, it cannot, from that domain, see material things as we see them, you know: they appear to mature which it in another form. But still the differences can be foreseen: the differences of environment, differences of activity in the environment are clearly seen, quite perceptible. It can have a vision that is total or global. It can choose. At times it chooses the country; when it wants a certain kind of education, civilisation, influence, it can choose its country beforehand. Sometimes it can’t, sometimes it chooses only its environment and the kind of life it will provide lead. And then from up there, before it comes down, it looks for the kind of vibrations it wants; it sees them with very clearly. It is as though it was aiming at the place where it is going to drop. But it is an approximation because of the fact that another condition is necessary: not only its choice but also a suitable ''milieu''receptivity from below and an aspiration. If one There must be someone in the environment it has chosen, generally the mother (sometimes both the parents, but the most indispensable is yogically the mother), she must have an aspiration or a receptivity, something sufficiently passive and open or a conscious he can actually prepare aspiration towards something higher. And that kindles for the psychic being a little light. In the mass representing for it the environment in which it wants to be born, if under the body influence of his next birthits own projected will a small light is kindled, then it knows that it is there it must go. Before It is necessary, it is this that makes the body difference in months or days, perhaps, not so much perhaps in years; however, this creates an uncertainty, and that is born he shapes and moulds why itcannot foretell the exact date: “On that date, so that day, at that hour I shall take birth.” It needs to find someone receptive. When it sees that, it rushes down. But what happens is he who something like an image: it is not exactly that, but something very similar. It throws itself down into an unconsciousness, because the physical world, even human consciousness whatever it may be, is very unconscious in comparison with the true maker of psychic consciousness. So it rushes into an unconsciousness. It is as though it fell on its head. That stuns it. And so generally, apart from some very very rare exceptions, for a long time it does not know. It does not know any longer where it is nor what it is doing nor why it is there, nothing at all. It finds a great difficulty in expressing itself, especially through a baby that has no brain, naturally; it while is only the parents embryo of a brain which is hardly formed and it does not have the new elements for manifesting itself. So it is very rare for a child to manifest immediately the exceptional being it contains…. That happens. We have heard about such things. It happens, but generally some time is needed. Only slowly it awakens from its stupor and becomes aware that it is there for some reason and by choice. And usually this coincides with the intensive mental education which shuts you completely from the psychic consciousness. So a mass of circumstances, happenings of all kinds, emotions, all sorts of things are only necessary to open the inner doors so that one might begin to remember that after all one has come from another world and one has come for a particular reason.Otherwise, if all went normally, it could very quickly have a connection, very quickly. If it had the adventitiousluck to find someone possessing a little knowledge, purely physical agentsand instead of falling into a world of ignorance, it fell upon a little bit of knowledge, everything would be done quite quickly. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/0305/vital5-conversionaugust-rebirth-and-personal-survival1953#p3p1,p44,p45,p46,p47,p48</ref>

If all goes well, if there is no accident (accidents can always happen), if all goes well at ''The formation of the moment the child is about to be born, the psychic force (perhaps not in its totality, but body depends entirely on a part of the psychic consciousness) rushes into the being man and from its very first cry gives it a push towards the experiences it wants the child to acquire. The result is that even if the parents are not consciouswoman, even if the child in its external consciousness but is not quite conscious (a little child does not have the necessary brain for that, it forms slowly, little by little), soul which manifests in spite of that, it will be possible for the psychic influence to direct all the events, all the circumstances of the life of this child till the moment it becomes capable of coming into conscious contact with its psychic being (physically it is generally between the age of four and seven, sometimes sooner, sometimes almost immediately, but in such a case we deal with children who are not "children", who have "supernatural" qualities, as they say—they are not "supernatural", but simply the expression of the presence of the psychic body which is being). <ref>http://incarnateword.formed, compelled to manifest in/cwm/04/24-february-1951#p23</ref>this body?''

''When great souls want to be born upon earth, do they choose their parents?Yes''. Ah! that depends on their state of consciousnessWell, it depends on is very exceptional, after all, in the state great mass of their psychic formationhumanity, that a conscious soul incarnates voluntarily. It is something very unusual. If the psychic being I have already told you that when a soul is completely conscious, fully formed, if it has reached the perfection of its being and is free wants to reincarnate or notincarnate, usually from its psychic plane it has also the capacity of choosing. But I believe I have explained that to you already. They don't have looks for a physical sight like ours so long as they are not in corresponding psychic light at a bodycertain place upon earth. SoBesides, during its previous incarnation, before going away, evidentlybefore leaving the earth-atmosphere, they look for usually as a body which result of the experience it had in the life that is adapted and fit coming to express theman end, the soul chooses more or less―not in all details but they must give broadly―the conditions of its share to the material inconscience, if future life. But these are exceptional cases. Possibly we could speak of it may be put thusfor ourselves here, and to but for the necessity to adapt themselves to majority, the most material laws vast majority of men, even those who are educated, it is out of the bodyquestion. SoAnd what comes then is a psychic being in formation, more or less formed, and there are all the stages of formation from the point spark which becomes a little light to the fully formed being, and this extends over thousands of view years. This ascent of the psychicsoul to become a conscious being having its own will, capable of determining the choice of the place where one is born is importantits own life, takes thousands of years.So, you are thinking of a soul which would say, “No, I refuse this body, I am going to look for another”?… I don’t say it is more than an insignificant detailimpossible―everything is possible. But there It does happen, in fact, that children are so many things still-born, which means that can't there was no soul to incarnate in them. But it may be for other reasons also; it may be foreseenfor reasons of malformation only; one can’t say. For instanceI don’t say it is impossible, one chooses an environmentbut generally, when a country, conscious and free soul chooses to take a certain type of familybody on earth again, one tries even before its birth it works on this body. So it has no reason not to see accept even the inconveniences which may result from the nature ignorance of the likely parents, one asks ; for it has chosen the place for certain already well-developed qualities in them and a sufficient self-mastery. But all this is reason which was not enough if one does not carry in oneself of ignorance: it saw a sufficient dynamism to overcome light there―it might have been simply the obstacleslight of a possibility, but there was a light and that is why it has come there. So, it is all things consideredvery well to say, “Ah! no, I don’t like it”, but where would it go to choose another it likes?… That may happen, this I don’t say it is not enormously importantimpossible, but it cannot happen very often. AnyhowFor, even at when from the best, even if psychic plane the parents have collaborated consciously, there is an enormous mass of soul looks at the subconscient earth and chooses the yet lower inconscient which from time place for its next birth, it chooses it with sufficient discernment not to time rises again to the surface, gets stirred up, damages the work, makes calmness be altogether grossly mistaken.It has also happened that souls have incarnated and silence indispensablethen left. There are many reasons why they go away. AlwaysChildren who die very young, always after a few days or a few weeks―this may be for a preparation similar reason. Most often it is said that the soul neededjust a little experience to complete its formation, even if one has chosen—a long preparationthat it had it during these few weeks and then left. Everything is possible. Not And as many stories would be needed to speak of tell the phenomenon story of being half-stunned at souls as are needed to tell the moment story of birthmen. That is to say, they are innumerable and the descent into the bodyinstances are as different as possible from one another.So, to decide arbitrarily: “It is like that, not like this; this is what happens and not that”, this is childishness. ''Everything''can happen. There are instances which often lasts for a very long time before occur more frequently than others, one can generalise, but one can escape from never say, “This is not possible and it completelyis always like this or always like that.” That is not how things happen. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/0508/3027-decemberjune-19531956#p10p16,p17,p18,p20,p21,p22</ref>

At times ''Can it [happen that the psychic being] chooses does not fall at the country; when place where it wants wanted to take birth?'' If a certain kind of education, civilisation, influencepsychic being sees from its psychic world a light on the earth, it can choose its country beforehandmay rush down there without knowing exactly where it is. Everything is possible. Sometimes it can'tBut if the psychic being is very conscious, sufficiently conscious, sometimes it chooses only its environment and will seek the kind light of life aspiration in a precise place, because of the culture, the education it will leadfind there. And then from up thereThis happens much more frequently than one believes, before it comes downespecially in somewhat educated circles. An intelligent woman with some artistic or philosophical culture, it looks for the kind a beginning of vibrations it wants; it sees them very clearly. It is as though it was aiming at conscious individuality, may aspire that the place where it child she is going to drophave may be the best possible according to her idea or according to what she has read. But Hence it is an approximation because of the fact that another condition is necessary: not only its choice but also so very complicated to find a receptivity from below and an aspirationplace. There must The number of psychic beings born constantly being considerable, if each time exceptional conditions have to be someone in the environment found it has chosenwould be difficult. Surely, generally there are instances where the mother (sometimes both the parentspsychic beings seems to have fallen headlong and been stunned, but the most indispensable this is the mother), she must have an aspiration or bad luck; in such a receptivity, something sufficiently passive and open or case it generally requires a conscious aspiration towards something higherlong time to wakeup. And It is bad luck in the sense that kindles for the psychic being it probably lacked a little light. In the mass representing for certain power of discrimination, or perhaps it the environment in had to face certain forces which thwarted its decision and won a partial victory over it wants to be born, if under the influence of its own projected will . There are a small light is kindledthousand possibilities, then it knows you know. One cannot say that it everything goes according to the same plan—every psychic being is there it must godifferent. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/0504/51-augustmarch-19531951#p46p37,p38</ref>

''When great souls want to be born upon earth, do they choose their parents?'' Ah! that depends on their state of consciousness, it depends on the state of their psychic formation...but generallyIf the psychic being is completely formed, when a conscious if it has reached the perfection of its being and is free soul chooses to take reincarnate or not, it has also the capacity of choosing… They don’t have a physical sight like ours so long as they are not in a body. So, evidently, they look for a body on earth againwhich is adapted and fit to express them, even before but they must give its birth share to the material inconscience, if it works on this may be put thus, and to the necessity to adapt themselves to the most material laws of the body. So it has no reason not to accept even the inconveniences which may result , from the ignorance point of view of the parents; for it has chosen psychic, the choice of the place for a reason which was not where one of ignorance: is born is important, it saw is more than an insignificant detail. But there are so many things that can’t be foreseen. For instance, one chooses an environment, a light there―it might have been simply country, a certain type of family, one tries to see the light nature of a possibilitythe likely parents, but there was one asks for certain already well-developed qualities in them and a light and ''that sufficient self-mastery. But all this is why'' it has come therenot enough if one does not carry in oneself a sufficient dynamism to overcome the obstacles. So, it all things considered, this is not enormously important. Anyhow, even at the best, even if the parents have collaborated consciously, there is all very well an enormous mass of the subconscient and the yet lower inconscient which from time to time rises again to saythe surface, "Ah! nogets stirred up, I don't like it"damages the work, but where would it go to choose another it likes?..makes calmness and silence indispensable. That may happenAlways, I don't say it always a preparation is impossibleneeded, but it cannot happen very ofteneven if one has chosen—a long preparation. For, when from Not to speak of the psychic plane phenomenon of being half-stunned at the soul looks at moment of birth, the earth and chooses descent into the place body, which often lasts for its next birth, a very long time before one can escape from it chooses it with sufficient discernment not to be altogether grossly mistakencompletely. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/0805/2730-junedecember-19561953#p20p9,p10</ref>

...the cases are quite different; it [choice to choose its place of birth in next life]depends more absolutely on psychological conditions than the condition in which they died and their last wish, and on material onesthe resolution of the psychic. It is not a mechanical or imposed thing, but it also depends on material conditionsis different for each one.... It depends on for the destiny which follows after death, the last state of development consciousness is usually the most important. That is, if at the moment of death one has the soul which wants intense aspiration to return to continue his work, then the conditions are arranged for it to reincarnate―we take be done. But, you see, there are all the word "soul" here possibilities for what happens after death. There are people who return in the sense psychic. You see, I have told you that the outer being is very rarely preserved; so we speak only of the psychic beingconsciousness which, indeed, what we call always persists. And then there are people for whom the psychic returns to the psychic being―it domain to assimilate the experience they have had and to prepare their future life. This may take centuries, it depends on the people.The more evolved the psychic is, the nearer it is to its state complete maturity, the greater the time between the births. There are beings who reincarnate only after a thousand years, two thousand years.The closer one is to the beginning of the formation, the closer are the reincarnations; and sometimes even, altogether at the lower level, when man is quite near the animal, it goes like this (''gesture''), that is, it is not unusual for people to reincarnate in the children of developmenttheir children, like that, something like that, or just in the next generation. But this is always on a very primitive level of evolution, and the milieu psychic being is not very conscious, it is in which the state of formation. And as it becomes more developed, the reincarnations, as I said, are at a greater distance from one another. When the psychic being is fully developed, when it no longer needs to return to earth for its development, when it is going absolutely free, it has the choice between no longer coming back to earth if it finds that its work lies elsewhere or if it prefers to incarnateremain in the purely psychic consciousness, without reincarnating; or else it can come when it wants, as it wants, where it wants, perfectly consciously. And there are those who have united with forces of a universal order and with entities of the Overmind or elsewhere, who remain all the time in the earth atmosphere and take on bodies successively for the mission work. This means that the moment the psychic being is completely formed and absolutely free—it when it is completely formed it becomes absolutely free—it can do anything it likes, it depends on what it chooses; therefore one can’t say, “It will be like this, it will be like that”; it does exactly what it wants and it can even announce (that has happened), at the moment of the death of the body, what its next reincarnation will be and what it will do, and already choose what it is going to fulfil―that makes many different conditionsdo.... It But before this state, which is not very frequent—it depends very largely absolutely on the state degree of development of the psychic and the hope formulated by the integral consciousness of the parents. For being—there is still the mental, vital and physical consciousness, united with the psychic consciousness; so at that moment, the moment of death, the moment of leaving the body, it goes without saying that there is formulates a hope or an aspiration or a stupendous difference between conceiving will, and usually this decides the future life. <ref>https://incarnateword.in/cwm/07/16-march-1955#p21,p22,p23,p24</ref> =More= At the risk of removing many illusions in your consciousness, I must tell you something about the source of a mother’s love for her child deliberately. It is because this child is made of her very own substance, with and for quite a conscious aspirationlong time, relatively long, the material link, a call to the invisible world link of substance, between mother and child is ''extremely'' close—it is as though a spiritual ardour, bit of her flesh had been taken out and conceiving put apart at a distance—and it is only much later that the tie between the two is completely cut. There is a kind of tie, of subtle sensation, such that the mother feels exactly what the child feels, as she would feel it in herself. That then is the material basis of the mother’s attachment for the child by accident and without intending to have . It is a basis of material identity, nothing else but that. Feeling comes much later (itmay come earlier, that depends on people), but I am speaking of the majority: feeling comes only long afterwards, and sometimes even without wanting it at is conditioned. There are all. kinds of things… I don't say that in could speak to you for hours on the latter case there cannot also subject. But still this must not be an incarnationmixed up with love. It is a material identification which makes the mother feel intimately, feel quite concretely and tangibly what the child is feeling: if the child receives a shock, well, but the mother feels it usually takes place later, not . This lasts at least for two months.This is the conceptionbasis. The rest comes from people’s nature, their state of development, their consciousness, education and capacity for feeling. <ref>httphttps://incarnateword.in/cwm/0806/2414-octoberapril-19561954#p17p23,p24</ref>